Artifact of Depression: Act I

Being depressed is a lot like being stuck underneath a big rock. You are constantly under a very near physical pressure, as if the world is trying it's best to put you in your grave. The only way out is to give in, or push back. I began my fight with this rock with a strong, strategical assault. Unfortunately, my forces we driven back, much like the Spartans of Thermopylae, and pinned against a wall, where they fought to they death, only to be crushed by this ever increasing weight. So, after fighting to overcome mental and physical exhaustion, I have learned to deal with it. I sleep only two hours a night, and perhaps only 3 nights a week... My eyes are like black holes, my mind a greased slide: i cannot grasp concepts or retain them. My memory also is failing, as I must write things down if i plan to remember them later on.

Only one good thing has come of this inability to rest. I have been practicing much more, and am getting farther along in my lessons that perhaps ever before.

to be continued...

The Message

Read it. It has some awesome information in it.

this is my attempt at posting a blog from my email...

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Scale The Summit

So it's now Sunday, a week later than I said i would finish my summation. I am in Wind Ensemble, miraculously. Galen Lemmon is a phenomenal percussionist, and I really think of him as a friend, as well as a teacher. Dr. Edward Harris is starting to get on my nerves though... all he thinks about is his wind ensemble, like it's the most important thing in the world. O_o Sometimes I wonder if I am in the right place for what I want to do...

My choice comes down to money, ultimately. If the Budget Crisis gets worse (which we all know it will) I might as well transfer down to MI, because at least I can justify wanting to be a performing drum set player. Anyone reading who is now thinking.... "wait, I thought he loved orchestral percussion..." well I do. I love it to death. I cannot get enough of it, but the truth is the SJSU music department is a mess. No one communicates; students are left to fend for themselves in what can only be called the hardest and most confusing major in the world. SJSU treats musicians like something to be stuffed in a dark corner of a darker closet. MI is all about putting music at the fore front of education.

For a change of pace, I have spent all of today reading various Wiki-articles. I started with "Lupus" and gradually because side-tracked, and ended up on "England." From there I read "Dodo," "Ostrich," "Black Death," "Elephant Bird" "Albertasaurus," Gigantoraptor," "Platypus," and about 15 more sub articles that are related to the afore mentioned. I have also found a steal on craiglist. A Rockstar DX drum set for $80.00! You can't find a deal like that.

More later....

The Human Abstract, Star wars in the Park, and Wind Ensemble

More of My Drums, thanks to Ryan, originally uploaded by anotherdrummer242.

All this week I have been obsessed with the band "the Human Abstract." They are an amazing band, and I want to make music similar to theirs, and Dream Theater's. Attached to this blog is another picture of my drum set (courtesy of LWG photography and Ryan Mannie). I spent a week refinishing it and making it look way more expensive than it really is. The shells are made of Poplar, which is basically like the paper plate of drummer-ry. You see where I am going? Anywho, much to my surprise, The drums not only look beautiful, they also sound somewhat better than before the change. Perhaps it was my extra time taken while tuning the drums, but I'd like to think its the lack of a vinyl wrap that makes it so much better. But I digress...

Tonight I went to see The Symphony Silicon Valley performing Works from the great John Williams, spanning several movies, including Jaws, Schindler's List, and Star Wars. I absolutely love the star wars music. Not just from one movie or another, but all six. Each one has it's own them that is some how tied into the movie before, or them movie after, episodes IV and VI being the exception, because Star Wars did not Exist before A New Hope, and it ends with Return of the Jedi. My favorite of them all however is the score to Episode III, because it ties all of the other Episodes together. PLus the percussion arrangements are so cool to listen to.

This semester I didn't audition for Wind Ensemble, which will ultimately bite me in the ass I think.

Will finish tomorrow or monday....

My First Photo Shoot....

Mckay, originally uploaded by Living with giants.

Thanks to my good friend, Ryan Mannie, I now have some really sexy pictures of my newly refinished drums. this is just one of the pics he took.

I really enjoy Hookah. If more people decide to follow my blog, I will suggest that we have hookah night if you happen to be local to San Jose.

Careful and Honest Contemplation, Pt. II

Cuddling, originally uploaded by anotherdrummer242.

The internets have failed me. I can no longer find anything that is remotely interesting. Xbox, you too have failed me. I can no longer while away a listless hour with on a game of shoot 'em up while listening to "double kill" repeat so often it becomes a chant. My mind has failed me. I am the most faithful boyfriend in the world, and yet in my infinite boredom I ponder the "what if" that will ultimately lead me down a path very much as dark as the bottom of the sea. I want more than anything to spend time with my wonderful girlfriend and see her smile. I think that will repair me.

In the lengthening weeks that I am without a car, I am more and more spending my time atop my solid frame 21 speed bike. Yesterday I rode for 3.5 hours at a constant pace of about 10/12 miles an hour. Nothing record breaking, but definitely a work out. Today I went on an hour long ride, and supplemented the remaining 2 hours with several reps of both pull ups and chin ups. Overall, since the end of May I have lost 15 lbs, and am now a respectable 145 pounds. oh yeah, I am 5'10.5" tomorrow I am going to ride to davis and back, probably at 9:00 am. I think I will get some Jamba Juice as a treat once I get to Davis, and then head back after a short rest.

I am also in the process of designing a tattoo for my self. it will be a full sleeve down my right arm. The basic design is a squid, on my upper arm, reaching with it's tentacles down and around my arm to end on my wrist. there are still some kinks worked out, like what the tentacles should look like. The squid itself is going to be dark and evil looking. totally emotionless eyes, and very true to life. the tentacles though I think need to be kinda "gross." An earlier tattoo design I had was one of a heart, draw in a rough "paint brush" style, on my inner right forearm. If there is a way to combine the two, that's what will happen.


OK ladies and gents, you know what I am up against. I shall bid you all farewell for the night, and reconvene tomorrow for a recitation of my day.